The Loss of Joy

Precious babies and newborn animals bring joy to so many. Painting, photography, sculpting, gardening, mountain climbing and cooking are also ways that people experience joy. When you suffer a loss and it snuffs the joy out of your life, it’s difficult to put a smile on your face.

Death, divorce, and other painful transitions, including the ending of a relationship with a parent, sibling, child or friend are experiences that may leave one feeling abandoned, rejected, and unloved. Any one of these losses or endings takes time to reconcile and it is in the reconciling that we can begin to connect with joy again.

Here are some suggestions to help you reconnect with joy:

1. Watch a funny movie or television show – no greater story than that of Patch Adams, a doctor who infused humour into his work with gravely ill children, demonstrates how laughter can lighten the burden on your heart. It’s okay to laugh after loss. You are not being disrespectful and it actually has positive benefits for your health.
2. Take time to smell the flowers – I know that sounds very cliché, but it really is about allowing yourself to just stop, breath and take in the beauty around you. Look at the magnificence of this world and take in its wonder and know you are part of the beauty that abounds.
3. Go out of your way to help someone else – this too may sound simplistic, but it works. Visit the elderly, listen to their stories, and watch the joy in their faces as you take interest. It will lighten your mood and both of you will part feeling that you matter.
4. Play like a kid – all of us know someone who has a child or children that we can spend time with if we don’t have our own. Children live in the moment. They find great joy in seeking out small bugs, chasing garden snakes, finger painting, skipping through mud puddles or having a story read to them. Be a kid for day with them… I guarantee you will have a new perspective.
5. Allow the joy into your life – this is a hard one, but the most necessary. We have to allow the experience of joy back into our life again. Pick up the camera, the paintbrush or your old guitar… just allow yourself to feel the happiness  that the gifts you have can bring to you and others.
6. Start loving yourself today and purposefully smile in the mirror. Someone will be smiling back at you.